Why Planning Your Future Can Lead To Misery (And What To Do Instead)

We all make plans. It’s in our nature to look to the future and think about how we want it to be.

But what happens when we spend so much energy (mental and physical) planning only to have our plans not come to fruition? It can be disappointing and even devastating. 

But there’s no need to suffer in that way and in this article, I’ll be discussing how to look towards the future in a way that leaves us feeling content and peaceful, regardless of our plans and their outcomes.

Why Planning the Traditional Way Doesn't Work

Most of the world focuses on outcomes for achievement and success. This is what we are taught from childhood.

But focusing on ‘your plan’ and outcomes can be harmful because when goals are not reached, this can lead to negative feelings about your self worth. Furthermore, we are not in charge of the outcome. That is Allah’s domain and His alone. Our domain is to set the right intention and give our best effort/action (with Ehsan) in whatever we do. At the end of the day, that is what we’ll be judged for. Not outcomes.  

If we focus on outcomes, then we start competing with Allah and we will never win. It’s a recipe for frustration, disappointment, heartache, and misery.

So If Making Plans Can Be Harmful, What Should We Do Instead?

Before I go further, let’s make a distinction between planning and preparing.

Planning involves making decisions and arrangements in advance. It involves knowing certain details necessary to achieving or doing something and the focus is on the outcome. On the other hand, preparing is also based on making arrangements for the future but the emphasis is on the effort. So regardless of the outcome (even if things may not go your way), it’s the effort that counts.

I personally believe the outcomes of our plans are irrelevant in this world. Ultimately, our goal is to get back to our original home in Jannah with Allah. So whatever happens (challenges and tests) that bring you closer to Allah and that ultimate goal, will only serve to strengthen and build you to become the best you.

Shifting your perspective from planning to preparing has everything to do with your intentions. You are no longer focused on achieving something to change your condition (outcome) but to doing something that will please Allah (SWT) or that will bring you closer to Him (your effort). It is no longer about you or your plan, it's about understanding that if your plan fails, it may not have been for you or simply not the right time. And this perspective gives you an opportunity to course correct with ease. 

So yes, set your goals, but don’t be fixated on the outcome. Rather, focus on your direction! If things are not going according to your plan, then pivot with the wisdom of your insights which come from clarity, a quiet mind, and being connected to Allah to hear the guidance He is sending you through those insights. 

By the way, sometimes it seems that you are going in the wrong direction. Well, that is qadr (God’s plan). Often, we need to go in the ‘wrong direction’ to see with clarity and conviction which is the right path for us. Then we can reflect on the lessons to be learned from that (and every) situation. That is how you find ‘the gold’ in life.

The important thing is to push forward with the intention to please Allah. Once we do this, the reward will manifest in this world and in the next. 

Are you feeling frustrated in trying to change your situation or a person in your life?

What is it that you have control over and what from within would be beneficial for you to change?